A keresés eredménye

#Saveanduse

Dead earth, dead stones.
Mud in brackets, gray, did you guess?
You're not so deeply buried, I find you, poisoned by insomnia.
With a feeling of death, with trembling hands, I engage in the game of hiding.
I follow the steam (salt) with inflamed eyes.
Another (sat), another (sat), another (sat), another (died).
Storage and consumption.
Blindness with narrowed eyes.
I'm in darkness with dazzling thoughts.
I am drunk in vain,
What makes me angry?
Tomorrow won't keep, today won't keep.
Another (sat), another (sat), another (sat), another (died).
 

Tbilisian Tragedy

'Nobody' will help you today.
'Nobody' seeks comfort.
'Nobody' will win this war.
And 'nobody' will survive today.
 
I see tears are choking you,
how can I help you, tell me, I'm begging you,
I see thoughts are intoxicating you,
tell me what are you crying for, why are you suffering?
 
I have turned flour into liquid,
I have flown as a salt vapour.
Loneliness is my destiny
what this city suffers from - is a tragedy
 
You, you understand this -
madness, the piece of tin foil.
You, you know this -
you are that 'nobody'
 
I see tears are choking you,
how can I help you, tell me, I'm begging you,
I see thoughts are intoxicating you,
tell me what are you crying for, why are you suffering?
I see the pain is breaking you, what is it you got so used to and can't let go?
I see death is chasing you, come home today and let's remember the smile.
 
I see tears are choking you,
I see thoughts are intoxicating you
I see the pain is breaking you
I see death is chasing you
 
I, I will find a way
I will break away
I, I will find a way
I will manage it.
I, I will find a way
I will swim across the sea.
I, I will find a way
I won't kill myself
 
I have a taste of chlorine in my mouth
and a smell of dampness in my nose,
the heaviness of these everyday thoughts
is crawling on my brain like worms
What I wanted to tell you,
I couldn't find in me.
When I thought I'd fly up,
I fell into a ravine.
The young are chased by death.
The old probably by 'passing away'.
I will pluck you from the hands of death tonight
and together we will survive this torture.
Romanticizing of our deaths
won't see the light of the dawn,
just like the song of the swan up in the air,
or the meeting of that kipchak
 

Suicide is Legal

When everything will be decided,
When there's no more doubts,
It isn't night yet, but it's already dark,
All the talks sound like rave.
If you're going to draw yourself
draw only in black.
Alcoholism is the sure way to kill yourself slowly.
To be gone while drunk — ideally.
Alcoholism is my way to commit suicide
And it is legal!
I have nothing to pay with,
But I have a dream, I'm ready to sell my dream.
Nobody will buy? Nobody?
Yes, all my words are drunk delirium.
I'll give you the answer for anything.
My poems are immoral.
Remember, it's legal to kill yourself.
The disgusting, sticky cold of floor.
In the toilet are vomited leftovers of yesterday's evening.
I remembered yesterday's evening because of idiotic talks
And the scent of subway.
Actually, this song begins only from here.
I'm sordid and cynical, yes, I am sordid and cynical.
Even that drunk bitch have told me about this.
Well, Hell with her.
Fuck it all! Fuck everything!
Fists and teeth are tightly clenched.
If they'll ask me how things are
I'll say: 'Fine'
And I'll continue to lie here,
For it is legal to kill yourself.
 

Bad Morning (Zlovo utra)

The leaden sky atop, dirty asphalt at the bottom.
My view from the window looks like a badly tightened scar,
Everything is gray, far too gray.
Morning — meet my hungovers.
Morning — take everything with you
In this world outside the window, where I was not
invited, let it burn with fire!
I thought I won't live, I won't live till the morning,
Raggy clouds, shards of glass,
I'm glad to see you.
I'm not even going to remember what happened this night,
I remember your smirk, in poor attempts to appear seductive.
Your blowjob was bad, I finished unconsciously.
But I couldn't make it to sleep...
After the 'marathon' I can never fall asleep.
Thoughts — words,
Stains on the floor — words,
My world from the window, I still
hate you! Bad morning to you!
People-stubs of reality, bad morning to you too!
Bad morning! Bad morning!
 

Alcoholism

I'm not one of those who believe in fate.
I'm not one of those who searches for fleeting pleasures.
I am ordinary nobody, I'm late everywhere.
I'm not one of those, who live up to the old.
I don't try to explain my dreams,
I get only fits of fatigue from them.
The fear of death often visited me,
I'm not one of those, who live up to the old.
Sticky gray everyday life.
I'm terrified by how disgusting my thoughts are.
I don't wait for anything, I'm late everywhere.
I'm not one of those, who live up to the old.1
Nightingale has a nice song —
A song of requiem for my head.
Blossomed — dissipated, grew — as for knife-making,2
And now suddenly it hung down, like lifeless.
Thoughts, my thoughts! Pain in temples and crown.
I have spent my youth prematurely, untimely.
How it happened, how it came by, I do not understand myself.
At night I press a hard pillow against my heart.
Go flowing, sonorous song, pour out a sad thrill.
In the dark it seems to me - I embrace my sweet.
Drink, sing in your youth, hit your lives without a miss —
Anyway, your beloved one once will fade out like a cherry.
I have fade, don't know where. In the drinking may be? In the glory?
They liked me in my youth, and now they have left me.
That's why the nightingale's song is nice —
A song of requiem for my head.
***
You're nonentity, you're nothing,
You've spent everything on your drinking.
 

• 1. Lines below belong to russian poet Sergei Yesenin.
• 2. The poet compares the head of his lyrical hero with a bird-cherry tree, which is often used for making knife handgrips.

Eyes Of A Homeless Dog

Today I saw the emptiness in his eyes,
Aimlessness of his eyes, a detachment,
This indifferent, not even expressed fear.
Now I know exactly how I am weak:
After all, I could never see In the eyes of a Homeless dog.
 
All of these roadways, all these streets,
Drenched streets, the eternally gray city,
They sucked all the juice out of your life emaciated body.
It's your last day, I know for sure!
Oh, if I don't drink away My last money, I'd buy you at least A piece of sausage.
But you seem to fuck everything.
You did not even notice that I sat next to you.
For you I'm another drunk who remembered?
That He, you see, He loves animals, When he is drunk.
Yes, you're right, my God, you're right.
I have another drunken scum, crouched beside you.
But how can I forget your eyes, how? How can I forget?
Someone might say that like you, are millions. You are like them, just hit the wrong time at the wrong place.
And where is the right place??? Where is the right time? Where? Where?
You shiver beats.
Yes, the municipality will take care of you:
You will burn in a landfill, after you go astray Some drunk driver.
The Earth absorbs what is left you.
If I could turn back time, I would like to never look into the eyes of this Homeless dog.